Let's be reasonable with one another, shall we?

Tuesday, June 12, 2007

An email joke

How many Christians does it take to change a light bulb?

Charismatic: Only 1. Hands are already in the air.

Pentecostal: 10. One to change the bulb, and nine to pray against the spirit of darkness.

Presbyterians: None. Lights will go on and off at predestined times.

Roman Catholic: None. Candles only.

Baptists: At least 15. One to change the light bulb, and three committees to approve the change and decide who brings the potato salad and fried chicken.

Episcopalians: 3. One to call the electrician, one to mix the drinks and one to talk about how much better the old one was.

Mormons: 5. One man to change the bulb, and four wives to tell him how to do it.

Unitarians: We choose not to make a statement either in favor of or against the need for a light bulb. However, if in your own journey you have found that light bulbs work for you, you are invited to write a poem or compose a modern dance about your light bulb for the next Sunday service, in which we will explore a number of light bulb traditions, including incandescent, fluorescent, 3-way, long-life and tinted, all of which are equally valid paths to luminescence.

Methodists: Undetermined. Whether your light is bright, dull, or completely out, you are loved. You can be a light bulb, turnip bulb, or tulip bulb. Bring a bulb of your choice to the Sunday lighting service and a covered dish to pass.

Nazarene: 6. One woman to replace the bulb while five men review church lighting policy.

Lutherans: None.Lutherans don't believe in change.

Amish:What's a light bulb?

8 Comments:

  • *Presbyterians: None. Lights will go on and off at predestined times.*

    Very good Rose :-)

    (Although, if I remember right, you sometimes speak about the doldrums of determinism. At least, we have a light now and again.)

    By Blogger GOODNIGHTSAFEHOME, at 6/12/2007 7:58 AM  

  • Do you remember mine:

    Exclusive Brethren: There is no power in the church to change the light bulb, we can only wait humbly in the darkness.

    Another one:

    Seventh Day Adventist: None on saturday.

    By Blogger Dyspraxic Fundamentalist, at 6/12/2007 9:03 AM  

  • Open Brethren: Depends how many feel led by the Holy Spirit to change it.

    By Blogger Dyspraxic Fundamentalist, at 6/12/2007 9:04 AM  

  • Ah, I needed that.

    By Blogger Jonathan Moorhead, at 6/12/2007 10:13 AM  

  • Hello goodnight.
    (that sounds funny!)
    Liver and Onions said "doldrums of determinism" - I thought it was very funny! Did i quote him on this blog?

    DF,
    I guess you must have posted this before? I had forgotten about it. Your entries are great.

    Jonathan,
    I am glad!

    By Blogger Rose~, at 6/12/2007 11:23 AM  

  • Hi Rose,

    That was hilarious! I got a good chuckle out of it..thanks for posting that.

    By Blogger Scribe, at 6/16/2007 8:25 AM  

  • Rose, that is hilarious, I may just have to link that one! LOLOLOLOLOL! Too funny! In Christ, A

    By Blogger Angela, at 6/16/2007 8:16 PM  

  • Thanks, Angela and Scribe. I am glad you enjoyed it!

    By Blogger Rose~, at 6/19/2007 6:35 PM  

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