Let's be reasonable with one another, shall we?

Sunday, August 12, 2007

Aint no Thing but a Chicken Wing?

I went to Applebees Restaurant with my daughter yesterday.
I ordered an appetizer platter that had several items on it.
The least appetizing was an item called "boneless chicken wings".
(I don't care much for bar-b-que chicken wings.)

When the platter arrived, I took one on my plate anyway.
I wondered what to expect - would it be all those little pieces of chicken that you typically find on a wing ... all pressed together, breaded ... and coated with sauce?

I cut it with my fork.
I was surpised to see solid white meat.
I cut it the other direction.
More solid white meat.

"Hmmm ... " I said to myself "...they must have gotten a nugget mixed in with this batch."
(It was yummy, by the way)

I took another one and cut it with my fork.
Same thing - solid white meat through and through - no matter what direction I sliced it.
All 5 of them were the same.

By the time I was done eating them, I figured it out.
They were not wings at all.
I had been eating chicken breast nuggets ...
... called "boneless wings."

I asked my waiter about it. "How are these 'chicken wings'?"
He admitted that he had tasted them before and he thought they were made from chicken breasts.

The waiter said he thought they called them "wings" because it "sold" them to the public.
(Funny - as I said, I actually don't like chicken wings - I prefer chicken breasts.)
He said I should write the corporate office of Applebees and tell them that they had the wrong name for this dish.
Such a nice young fella.

So ... I ate chicken breast nuggets which were called "boneless chicken wings."
I wondered - "How would they take the bones out of a chicken wing ... and how would it look and taste?"
I suppose I will never know.

This whole thing was very disconcerting.

Words mean something to me!


  • I wondered how you were going to bring this into a theological discussion, Rose! Good job.

    If you're talking about their appetizer sampler platter, I love that thang! The chips & spinach dip are out of this world! Also, the mozzarella sticks! Oh me!

    By Blogger David Wyatt, at 8/12/2007 9:08 PM  

  • That is naughty of them.

    Do you not have an Advertising Standards Agency in Yankland?

    By Blogger Dyspraxic Fundamentalist, at 8/13/2007 4:03 AM  

  • David,
    Yes! That is the very one! Had you noticed that about the "boneless chicken wings"?
    I liked the spinach dip - that is what I ordered it for.
    Where is the theological discussion, David??


    Yes, naughty.
    We do. Maybe I should take them to task for false advertising.

    By Blogger Rose~, at 8/13/2007 11:29 AM  

  • No, Rose, I had not noticed the bonelss wings thing. I had eaten thewings, but they were too spicy for my taste.

    The theological part I thought was the part about words meaning things. I was thinking you were relating this to the literalness of Scripture or something along that line.

    By Blogger David Wyatt, at 8/13/2007 8:12 PM  

  • David,
    I was thinking that, actually. You caught me!

    By Blogger Rose~, at 8/18/2007 9:19 AM  

  • I knowed you had a theological bone to pick!! (haha!)

    Hey Rose! Guess where my wonderful wife & I went for lunch, & what I had fo' lunch today? Yep! That platter! But they have a new one! It still has the wangs, but has added 2 mini-burgers (YUM!) as well as something called some kind of "towers" which were very good also, as well as somethuing else.
    You're right, though, words do mean things. Which reminds me of something profound that the late immminent theologian Curly Howard of 3 Stooges fame once said. As he was on the witness stand in court, and was being sworn in, the question was asked, "do you swear..." to which Curly broke in with... "No, but I know all the woids!"

    By Blogger David Wyatt, at 8/18/2007 6:09 PM  

  • Howdy Rose!

    Had that platter again today!

    Still not the wings though...

    By Blogger David Wyatt, at 8/25/2007 10:01 PM  

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